Throw it away; 2020

Phew hi, it’s the last week of 2020 and for me it is time to reflect. 

What didn’t work in 2020? 

No, I don’t mean the virus or the election. I mean what did you do, say, think, feel that didn’t work in 2020?

For me I had too much. Too much stuff. Too many emails. Too many facebook posts. Too much news. Too much anxiety about the future. Too much take out. Too much pretending to be okay. Too much holding onto the past. Too much doubt. I know, we were in a pandemic and that brings out a collective anxiety that none of us have experienced and that’s why I am giving myself lots of grace for the too much-ness. 

That doesn’t mean I am going to drag it into 2021 with me. My mental health cannot deal with that type of garbage juice. Some would say I am being ruthless to declutter my life of physical stuff, virtual stuff and emotional stuff. I think I am doing what I ought have done years ago, but didn’t have the strength. I started this year with a yarn buying freeze because I needed a change. Read about it here. And that one act gave me unshakeable determination to keep purging places of too much. 

So here we are on the last week of a horrible year and I am giving away chairs, organizers that never really worked, and bought a used desk chair. Guys I had been using a kitchen chair all year because it “worked okay and was free.” That crap is going in the recycling in 2021. 

This season of life for me is all about burning away at everything until I have what is good, necessary and a favorite to quote Emily Ley. From those ashes I know a better version of me is waiting.

PHEW! Thanks for listening, I really needed to put my headspace into words. What do you need in 2021? What lessons did you learn in 2020?